Types of Malaysian Girls We Date/Dated

1. The High School Sweetheart

Well most of us had a high school sweetheart. She was everything to us. She meant the world to us. We would do anything to just please her. It was a strange feeling that we cannot understand. You would do anything for her. And you thought that she was the one that you are going to be married to in the future. Calling her your wife, holding her hand, giving her gentle kisses. Parents would say that we are stupid and some of us screw our studies up for her. Parents call it puppy love but we call it everlasting love. But, guess what? Our parents was darn right about her. Pity. She leaves you for another guy after all the trouble that you went through for her.

2. The F**K Buddy

Most of us after high school we begin our College/University life. Things are different when you are in college/university compared to your schooling life. You suddenly know so many girls with short skirts and you basically get erections towards anything that is revealing. Most of us meet our first F**K buddy online, at a friend’s party or maybe even in a club. We are sexually attracted to her in all ways but you don’t want to spent your life with her and she also understands that. You usually don’t bring her out to meet your friends. You usually go out on a secret date or meet in a place where you are never found by your friends or family.

3. The Party Girl


Once you turn 18, you suddenly realise there is a whole new world out there. You start experimenting on alcohol and sometimes even drugs (mostly marijuana). You are always tend to be found in a club or in a bar. You tend to follow a cool set of friends going to these places. You find it different hanging out with these friends as they have girls in their group. You tend to get attached to some of the girls in the group and end up dating one of them. But after awhile you realise that this is not what you want. You still want the same thing when you are in high school, a decent girl.

4. The Religious Girl

Face it you are a nice guy. To her you are some macho man. Its fun to play the crazy guy showing her that you know alot about the world. But there is no real crazy of real repressed crazy (she tends to be wild in bed and sometimes you can’t take it). The worse part, she is still going to wake you up for 8am mass.

5. The Hot One


This is it, the perfect 10,what years of television, print advertising and internet porn has finally came to real life. You would tell your friends what a hottie you are dating and all your friend would think, ”I wish I was him.” People in the club or in the mall would be jealous of you having a hot girlfriend. But deep down you know that you are insecure about her. ”C’mon how the f**k did i land her. Look at me and look at her.” You would keep a picture of her to show to friends, but she will not.

6. The Gold Digger

Why date her when she is after your money? Well, you can’t resist her charms. She looks nice, sweet and you might think that this can actually work. ”Baby, can you buy me this Prada handbag, my Gucci handbag already giving way.” She is always asking you to buy things for her but you do it for her because you are maybe under her spell. She is always condemning the car you drive. ”Baby, Andrew is driving a BMW and you are driving a Proton, why can’t you be like him.” You still put up her shits but at one point you realise that you are stupid and you will end things with her.

7. The Foodie


She likes to eat. She is always adventurous when it comes to trying new food but you are not. You rather eat at the mamak or a chinese shop near your house. You spent most of your money on food and sometimes on food that you don’t even like. You would say, well at least I’m trying something new but you are actually getting f**ked in the ass. Sometimes you might even put on weight until the friend you hang with everyday says, ”hey man you are getting fat.”

8. The Overachiever

Well, she is a brainiac. When people compare you and her academically or even career wise, you are nothing compared to her. Her friends might think you are a loser and why is she hanging around you. Whatever you do for her, she still thinks that she deserve better. She knows you can do better, but the sad truth is that you can’t. You are who you are. You get overly insecure and one day you finally screw things up and you guys go on your separate ways. You might think that she would be sad for you but no, she works even harder and post pictures of her success on Facebook.

9. The Friend

She is the girl that you tell all your problems to. You and her talk to each other daily. Your friends and her friends think that you are dating or should be dating because you guys can really relate to each other. You feel relaxed and comfortable with her. She is always by your side. It’s like dating your hoodie, but who in the right mind would want to f**k their hoodie.

10. The Different Race Girl

You are always attracted to your own race. But for some reason you find that this other girl who is a different race attractive. You both can hit it off well. You and her understand each other well. You feel comfortable with her and she is not an alien to you. Her friends might think that you are a bad guy because you are not of the same race as them. ”Eh Michelle why you dating that Indian guy. You know he is Indian right.” Her parents are strict when it comes to interracial marriage. After a few month realizing that it is going to be hard she end things with you.

11. The Perfect One


She is smart, funny, beautiful and all you are wondering is what she is doing there with you. She is out of your league. C’mon be confident, you are not going to mess this up, you won’t mess this up, booom, you messed it up. How did you messed this up? You are too afraid of messing things up that you mess things up. F**K!!

Written by FunnyMalaysia

The leading media company in Malaysia for the social age, intensely focused on delivering high quality original reporting, insights and viral contents.