How We Malaysians Play Football


1. The fattest one is always the goalkeeper. If there is no fat guys on your team, the ”kaki bangku” will be the goalkeeper 

fat ones become goalkeeper

2. Penalties and free kicks are only awarded when a player gets injured from a bad tackle even though it is not the tackler’s fault. 

Najib plays ball and gets hurt

3. During the team selection round, if you are picked the last that means you are actually a bad player in the eyes of others 


4. There is no such thing as a referee when you play football with your friends. Everyone becomes a referee. If you fall, it’s a foul on the opponent 


5. Speaking of no referee on the field, we also do not have proper safety equipments. No boots, no shin guard, no proper stockings and well sometimes we even go barefoot


6. If there is no ball, a plastic bottle or a crushed aluminium can will replace the ball. Playing with crushed aluminium can was portable during schooling days. You can play it anywhere and any time during school hours. 


7. The match only ends when everyone is tired. There is always this one guy who still wants to play (this guy is not a smoker)


8. When the first goal is scored, the other team ”bukak” their ”baju”, so it’s easier to identify who is on which team 


9. No matter how many goals you are winning by, the winner is always determined by ”THE NEXT GOAL WINS THE GAME”


10. Usually there is only one good player allowed in each team. If there are too many good players in one team, we usually make them as Captains and ask them to pick their teams. 

One does not simply score a goal

11. When we play, we always ”berangan” we play like Aguero or something and we think as if we are in some kononnya English Premier League (EPL)


Well, the good news is DASHING is giving you a chance to make your ”berangan” come true by training like Pros in Manchester City for 3 days! Not only this, also watch MAN CITY vs MAN UNITED live in UK for free!!! How do you do so? Click on the link below to find out how you Malaysians can win a 3 day football camp at Manchester City FC. Click here to find out how to meet Agüero

Dashing Competition 1

Written by Dashing Malaysia

The DASHING men is always Fun & Sparky. He is resourceful, confident and full of ideas.