19 Things Americans can do easily but Malaysians cannot

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NOTE: Make no mistake, this is NOT an attempt to diss Malaysia. I love and respect my country. And there are many areas where Malaysia is a lot better than America.

1. Greeting Strangers

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If someone says hi to you in public you would get scared. ”Is this guy trying to rob me?”. Some will say, ”What a creep, I don’t even know him”

2. Not giving a damn about PDA (Public Display of Affection)

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The moment when we see someone kissing in public, we say ”HARAM” or ”Get a room”

3. Following escalator etiquettes

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We are supposed to stand in a line

4. Giving a friendly hug to friends of the opposite sex

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”Hope I don’t get an erection”

5. Holding the door for someone

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”You got hands what, why must I open for you”

6. Throwing trash into the dustbin

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Malaysians: ”The world is our dustbin”

7. Talking to your children about sex

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”He will find out for himself when he is 21″‘

8. Complying with zebra crossing rules

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”Need to use lines to crossroad ah?”

9. Minding your own business

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We always need to know what other people are doing

10. Giving way to the ambulance/fire brigade

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Some a**hole will be tailgating the ambulance

11. Quitting your job just for a road trip

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12. Not using the pedestrian bridge to cross a road

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”For what use the pedestrian bridge, need to walk up so many stairs, tired la”

13. Not staring at women/foreigners

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”Waaah Mat-Salleh so handsome”

14. Not being judgemental about lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders (LGBTs)

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”Kau ni memang macam pondan la”

15. Following basic movie-hall etiquettes

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STFU!!! You don’t need to talk in the cinema. There are many clowns in Malaysia who performs in the cinema

16. Allowing boys to grow long hairs in school

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”If you have long hair in school you are the budak jahat”

17. Following you passion

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18. Not judging someone based on their profession

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”Wah you know ah, he is a Dato. Sure rich one”

19. No impatient honking

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”See the driver, sure lady driver”
 The point I am trying to make is that Malaysia can be a lot better if we take some cue from the West and adopt these qualities. 

Written by FunnyMalaysia

The leading media company in Malaysia for the social age, intensely focused on delivering high quality original reporting, insights and viral contents.